Friday, Chicago, Illinois

For the past two days my colleague Dr. Glenn Sparks and I delivered a lecture and workshop on small groups to a conference at the amazing Willow Creek Community Church. This "mega church" is in the affluent northwest suburbs of Chicago and is truly an incredible place. Last night I performed a lecture and standup comedy to an audience of several thousand. And this evening it was broadcast to many thousands more around the country. It is always a blast as a performer to do my thing in front of a large, appreciative audience.

The gathering was for this popular, annual conference attended by several thousand from around the country. Like many large congregations Willow Creek is engaged in an ongoing effort to encourage those who attend their services to become active in small group experiences. Too often visitors to these churches remain worship spectators and never personally engage in relationships with the others all around them. So a zealous effort has emerged to encourage people to meet together and form lasting relationships with other members. To this end they have embraced the thesis and perspective of Refrigerator Rights as part of their initiative for encouraging congregations to promote the development of small groups.

Chicago, Illinois

Tomorrow evening I will be giving a keynote speech at the Willow Creek Church outside of Chicago. This huge and active congregation is holding an annual conference on small groups and their role in the congregation. It’s an exciting opportunity for me (and my research colleague Dr. Glenn Sparks will be joining me) because of the obvious synergy between the idea of cultivating small-group life with the message of our book Refrigerator Rights.

The essential message of our book is that the combination of constant moving with hours of attachment to screens - television, the Internet and other devices - has combined to create a typical American lifestyle that is detached, singular and separate. And such a lifestyle is directly associated with the problems we are facing with stress related disorders especially depression and anxiety. What is your lifestyle? Do you have the social support network you need to function?

Do you have Refrigerator Rights?

Tuesday, West Lafayette, Indiana

Every Presidential election rouses strong feelings. Over my lifetime there have been 15 elections (including the current contest) and I was old enough to be aware of 13 of them. From the squeaky close victory of the charismatic John Kennedy through the Nixon debacle, the surprising emergence and power of Ronald Reagan, the head spinning adventure of Bill Clinton and the mind boggling style of George Bush, I have witnessed and felt the passions of the country throughout it all.

And as intense as the Bush versus Gore controversy was in 2000, the present contest has more toxic fuel percolating in it than any I can remember. It has been well documented that this campaign - especially as we have seen in the coverage of the crowds following  John McCain - has become over heated in its venom toward Barack Obama. I understand the tactical decision to be aggressively critical of your opponent, but the pathological fervor being tapped among the deranged, the stupid and the easily provoked is unnerving to say the least. It is, as one critic noted is “playing with fire.”

At a time when the country is demoralized and frightened about our future, playing to the most base impulses of the worst of us is more than unseemly - it is dangerous. There are plenty of reasons to be uncertain about which candidate’s philosophy   and approach will be best for us, but appealing to the mob is the wrong way to go. Many of the idiots yelling out bile are unpatriotic and don’t deserve to have their voice heard.

Refrigerator Rights now has a group space on Facebook. Check it out & join!

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SUNDAY, October 12, 2008
Lafayette, Indiana

Well, well, well…I boast about my diligent daily entries for two years and then disappear - without warning - for six weeks. Isn’t that special!?

I deserve to be thrashed (ah…metaphorically. Please don’t actually come and thrash me)

I am on the Bob & Tom Show tomorrow morning and I hope you can listen.

I will be talking about the third edition of the book Refrigerator Rights that was just released.

In any event, I will be picking up the ball again so - thanks for the toleration.

Monday, West Lafayette, Indiana

Without giving away my exact political preferences (although regular readers here may be able to tell - or think they can) mostly what I am is averse to rigidity and narrow ideologues. And so, as we are all aware, cretins of both stripes occupy the bleachers of both the Democrats and Republicans. And they all make me gag!

I find the bombast of Al Sharpton as odious as that of Sean Hannity. Neither of these morons demonstrate any flexible thinking. Everything about them and their ilk (Ann Coulter & Moveon.org) is about attacking anyone not fitting into their preconceived ideas — which is the depth of stupidity. And as a citizen, I have had enough of over exposed stupidity in the media and in government.

With all that said, I do recall listening once to the millionaire blowhard Rush Limbaugh and agreeing with his analysis about the difference between Republicans and Democrats. I’m paraphrasing, but he said in effect that Republicans are generally unified by some few core beliefs — small government, economic conservativism, etc..

In contrast, he asserts that the Democrats are a motley collection of mixed ideas and are really not joined collectively by any particular principles. And to a large degree, although I have certainly voted for Democratic candidates in the past, and will again this fall, I think this is an accurate assessment. And I believe that it accounts for the fact that only 2 Democrats have been elected president in the past 46 years.

The Democrats, quite frankly have become a tiring and irritating soap opera. Whether or not you are a supporter of Obama, it has certainly been disconcerting to watch Bill and Hillary Clinton engaged in the juvenile antics of rejected teenagers making problems for the Democratic initiative. The latest is Bill Clinton apparently complaining about the role he has been assigned at the convention. This is a guy I used to admire. And in less than one year he has so turned me off that I want him to just disappear. I for one believe that he was personally responsible for sabotaging his wife’s campaign with his stupid antics during the primaries. As much as I admire Obama, I believe that Hillary Clinton would have secured the nomination if it wasn’t for the negative presence of her idiot husband.

It will be interesting to watch the show this week. Let’s see if Democrats can come out of this and into the campaign behaving like something other than recent Democrats.

Friday, Lafayette, Indiana

It’s a delight to announce that the book Refrigerator Rights: Our Crucial Need for Close Connection has been updated and rereleased! The new version has added a chapter and updated all of the research studies affirming our central thesis that between moving and media Americans are experiencing record levels of stress disorders, unprecedented throughout the world. In fact, we lead the world in depression, anxiety and stress related health ailments.

The book makes the argument that the driving force behind these problems is our lifestyle of separation and individuality, self-reliance and disconnection. It has helped countless readers rethink their priorities and the lifestyle they have chosen that puts too narrow a focus on their significant other and immediate family, marginalizing the need for extended relationships.

The research is clear, and I hope you will do yourself a favor and learn about your need for Refrigerator Rights Relationships.

Thursday, Lafayette, Indiana

I am ashamed to confess that I m not very interested in the Olympics in China. Part of it I suppose is the consequence of the difference in time zones - I believe when it is prime time here it’s the next day in China. So in the early evening when I am interested in watching it seems that the events featured are women’s beach volleyball - which to me seems like an ESPN 2 feature that holds no interest for me. And don’t give me this hogwash that the appeal of beautiful young women athletes in bikinis is about the sport. Uh, not!

That said, two of the athletes that have broken through the maize of coverage are two young supermen. First, of course was the amazing Michael Phelps. As hoped before the games began, he outdid the legendary Mark Spitz with 8 gold medals and world records in the pool! Then there is the new world phenomenon Usain Bolt, the Jamaican rocket who blew away the competition in the sprints. Like Phelps, it is hard to imagine any individual athlete being so much more powerful than all the other world-class performers. But like other sports icons like Tiger Woods and Michael Jordan, these guys are made of different stuff.

Now here is the problem. All across the world, despite all evidence to the contrary, children with little aptitude will start spending hours swimming and running in order to become the next legend. And like 90% of the competitors on American idol, they would be well advised to spend their devotion and hours pursuing such dreams as education, reading and the arts. But call me a cynic, I just don’t see American parents losing their passion for finding ways for their beloved, unique children to achieve the American dream.

Wednesday, Lafayette, Indiana

I’ll share more about this tomorrow. Have a great day, and thanks for sticking with me.

Tuesday, Indianapolis, Indiana

Living and working at Purdue University has given me an appreciation for the genius of engineers. Every day I am appreciative of the stunning advances in technology that have allowed me to work on my own terms living in the Midwest. Just a few years ago it was imperative that I reside either in New York or Los Angeles for my career. What a country.

Part of the thrill I have as a consumer is keeping up with the continuing advance of ever more breathtaking devices and technologies. And this week is no exception with the announcement that our scientists are getting close to developing…are you ready…INVISIBLE CLOTHING! Say what!?

That’s right, according to a story in the Associated Press, “researchers have demonstrated for the first time they were able to cloak three-dimensional objects using artificially engineered materials that redirect light around the objects.” It went on to suggest that this development would allow us to “hide people and objects from visible light.” Wow!

Not surprisingly the earliest applications will likely be military, which means that we could see a live battle on CNN with the only thing visible are the smoke from the weapons and the targets. And then there will be commercial applications as well. Certainly the private detective business has to be hugely buzzed about this prospect. And even their spouse cheating targets can stay ahead of the divorce authorities. What a world!