Tuesday, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Dr. Gunnar Ollsen is a senior research fellow at the Teletherapy Institute in Fowler Indiana. He was born in Holland and emigrated to the U.S. as a teenager. He became addicted to television, typically devoting over one hundred hours each week to watching. Sent by his parents to counseling, he then developed a reaction formation and became committed to spreading the idea that television is destroying American civilization. He now devotes his life to the science of teletherapy - the study of hidden meanings in television programs. He sent the following to me:

(CAUTION: Some of the writing below shows signs of incoherent rambling and may indicate a decompensation or even a psychotic break on the part of Dr. Ollsen. Pick out only what is helpful for you)

Dr. Will,

At a recent conference on the effects of television I was asked repeated questions about whether television causes anger and violence. The whole discussion became heated and several chairs were thrown. It seems that there is a need for a sane analysis on television and anger. And since you are the one credited with tying these two issues together in your classic text Why We Watch: Killing the Gilligan Within, I thought I would share these thoughts with you.

Television and Rage: The Dilemma of Anger

No theory of psychological healing is valid if it fails to address anger, perhaps the most fundamental of all human struggles. Anger is the cause of untold amounts of misery and failure. It has baffled the greatest minds in history. Every great thinker has wrestled with the problem of anger; millions of great and wise words have been expressed to help us in the battle against our inner rage. Freud himself admitted that trying to adequately define the concept of anger was a task that often enraged him (one famous incident involved throwing pool equipment out a window while vacationing at a spa while trying to collect his thoughts on the subject of anger).

My own father, Todd Ollsen said to me when I was ten years old, “don’t be angry … ever.” Moving in its simplicity, these words served as a guiding force as I entered the field of mental health and sought to unravel the mystery of this most disquieting human emotion. After many years of intense study, many of which enraged me as well, imagine my euphoria when it suddenly struck me upon reading your book and hearing your lectures that television was the answer!

There can be no doubt that we are in desperate need of a new response to human anger. Many strategies have been developed, all to little effect. The fact is that American society has become a boiling cauldron of contempt, a percolating pot of provocation, an oven of animosity. Where can we turn for relief? What is the common denominator?

As we look around for a source of hope, it becomes apparent that what we all share is the reflective glow of the television screen on our hot faces. It is through television that we can be reached. And this is the essence of the miracle of Teletherapy. This is what you discovered many years ago while working at the Nick-at-Nite Research Labs in Puerto Rico.

The answer to the dilemma is simple: watch more television that resolves anger in a peaceful way. Or focus on programs that portray clear consequences for the outbursts of an individual’s anger: shows that depict perps being pummeled by righteous authority figures. Select dramas where the guilty are harshly punished and the peaceful people are saved. Never watch shows that equivocate about the consequences of violence. What good does the anti-hero do anyway? In the words of Carl Jung, “anti heroes are almost always repressed turds” (loosely translated from his German).

What good does it do to sit through a program where someone guilty of anger walks away scot free? Nothing…absolutely nothing…except…to make you angry. And even when there is a two part series,if the first episode ends in a cliff hanger here an angry person seems to prevail, you must sit through the sequel to experience a gratifying resolution. And if the episodes are separated by a week, arrange to remain at home until the matters are resolved.

For those who are victims of the angry: form watch associations and cultivate warm friendly relationships with the local police who will happy to come to your rescue and aggressively subdue the violators. And for those who are angry and take it out on others, your day of reckoning is at hand. The peaceful are fed up with you and your ilk. There will be blowback!

So before you act out your inner rage, sit and watch at least twelve hours of Law and Order: Criminal Intent. Gentle but clear thinking Detective Bobby Goren will use his brain to overwhelm your primitive impulses. Bobby will bring you down, and Detective Eames will be standing by to laugh at your humiliation.

Have a great day!

Gunnar

Perhaps you are unaware if your anger has become a problem for you.
Using your experience as a viewer, see if these signs seem familiar to you:

- Tearing labels off beverage bottles while viewing television

- While channel surfing, making exaggerated changing gesture to move past religious programming.

- Unnecessarily loud hand striking when using “The Clapper” device.

- Habitual lip biting while watching rugby

- Lingering fantasies of retaliation against inconsiderate behavior by sitcom characters. (e.g., spending more than twenty minutes ruminating about a confrontation with Ted Baxter. NOTE: if this behavior includes actually making a physical list of such strategies, or attempts to make contact with the actor, seek help as soon as possible)

- Sweat soaked clothing while watching Without A Trace

- Upon entering a bathroom, you have a sudden outburst mimicking the sound effect of the shower scene in the movie Psycho

- Fantasies of physical retaliation against Monk

- When alone watching Ultimate Fighting you stand and imitate the movements of the participants

- You own a black SUV with darkened windows